Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Emotions

Day 4.

"The emotions of daily life are the stuff of our transformation.

Living your yoga: Spend today observing your emotions: irritation, boredom, anxiety. Let them rise and fall and remember you are not your feelings. They offer you insight into yourself, that's all. Let them go."

(A Year of Living Your Yoga by Judith Hanson Lassater Phd.)

Well, today I had plenty of emotions to observe! We were up at the crack of dawn to go into the city for my son's medical appointment. I didn't sleep well last night, kept having weird dreams and our cat licks himself REALLY loudly!

When we got to the doctor's, she told us it would take about an hour, so my daughter and I went for a walk. We went to a big, beautiful park. The weather was fabulous, very warm considering it's still Winter. DD climbed trees and ran around the fountains and I enjoyed sun rays on my face.

But then I got a call from my husband, the doctor had called him at work because she didn't have my number. Our son wasn't well and could I come and get him? DD looked so disappointed, we were in sight of the swings and slides and we also had plans of going to their favourite indoor playground later in the day. " I guess we can go another day" she said sadly as I practically dragged her away.

My DS was in the midst of an anxiety attack when we finally got there, he was as pale as a sheet and shaking all over, the poor thing had no idea what was happening to him. DD teared up as well when she saw him.

We all sat outside until he could walk but he wanted to go home and at the same time didn't want to go in the car. DD told him about the park and he agreed to go. It didn't take long being on the green grass with trees around to relax him. We stayed for ages and I forgot all the things I wanted to get done today. We did make it to the indoor playground, I still have a mountain of things to get done but overall it turned into a wonderful day!

My yoga practice will be to do some relaxing poses before bed to release those emotions of the day. xxx

 

Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Garudasana

 

( Copyright Deb Salter)


Day 3.

Today was another busy day, I was proud of myself that I managed to practice before I walked out the door. Today is the official third day of my 365 days of Yoga, I say "official" because, basically I restarted my yoga practice a little while ago. Even though it's only three days into my self imposed Yoga Challenge, what I'm loving about this is that every day I do something new.

Before, I used to do the same 20 minute routine several times a week. I thought if I kept doing it, I would eventually achieve perfection. When I started my Yoga365, it was obvious I couldn't do the same thing every day, Omg that would drive me nuts! So I've been trying different things. Each day I'm excited to practice because I know I'm going to discover something new, and I'll feel good too!

Today's practice came from a video on Yoga Beautiful's website. It was a demonstration of Garudasana (Eagle's pose). I used to be able to do this pose once upon a time, but the last time I went to class, I found I couldn't do it anymore. The video went through three progressions of the pose, Rev. Jahne Hope Williams maintains that the key to this pose is to master balance first. There were three positions for the legs taking into account the abilities of the practitioner, after going through each stance I got that foot around the back of the opposite calf, Yay! I also finally found out the secret as to which arm corresponded to which leg. All in all, I was pretty pleased.

Another horrendously busy day tomorrow, I may or may not be able to post, hope I see you!

 

Monday, August 26, 2013

Everyone needs a pair of red shoes.




Day 2 Red Shoes.
"Everyone needs a pair of red shoes.


Sometimes practicality interferes with living fully.  If you don't own a pair of red shoes, buy a pair and go dancing with someone you love as soon as possible!"

(A Year of Living Your Yoga. Judith Hanson Lassater Phd.)


I do own these red shoes, but if I tried dancing in them I would have to complete the rest of my yoga365 on crutches!  I'm afraid today isn't a very good day for buying shoes or dancing.
  
We're going to the snow soon and today I'm dog proofing the living area.
Pepe will experience a great privilege while we're away, staying unsupervised with the whole downstairs at his disposal.  Don't worry, we're not leaving him to fend for himself or anything, he will be visited often by his great friend from Our Little Monsters pet sitting.  I do worry about the things that might find themselves into his jaws though.

Today, I tried some Vinyasa Flow Yoga., I used this Youtube video.  I've never done this type of yoga before and it was really enjoyable.  Somehow, moving on the breath was challenging physically, but not so much that all I could think about was the discomfort, which sometimes happens to me with other styles of yoga.    I think striving in a pose can defeat the purpose.  In classes, I've often been told not to come in and out of a pose, to breathe through it and accept the discomfort.  I know we shouldn't be flopping about in class, but here at home, I don't push myself to the limit.  This is partly because I don't want to aggravate any Chronic Fatigue and partly because if I'm in too much discomfort, I lose focus.  I really want to learn this year- to learn about myself and my connection to the Universe.  A few days ago I practiced by only going 2/3 of the way into each pose (a suggestion from "A Year of Living Your Yoga") I got so much out of that session, I was so much more aware of my breath working with my body and I was aware of where I was in space.

I really enjoyed Savasana (Corpse Pose) today, it is and always has been one of my favourite places to be.  When my body softens into the floor, I feel like a kid again, like when I felt completely safe in this big world because I knew I was watched out for and cared for.

Well, it's time to get tidying.  See you tomorrow!

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Day 1: Ambivalence



Day 1,  25th August.

"Ambivalence is part of every human relationship."
(A Year of Living Your Yoga, Judith Hanson Lassater Phd.)

Last night I was reading news articles online.  I was drawn to a picture of a large bodied woman being interviewed for a tv show, I turned to my husband and was about to say "Look at this poor woman!"  when I caught myself.  I recognised I was not going to say it from a place of compassion.  I was going to say it from a place of judgement.  I kept my mouth shut, but immediately was overcome with a sense of guilt and confusion.  

I can see today that it was a case of Ambivalence, it's simply easier to respond to things with judgement or  to not acknowledge them at all. To really feel ambivalence means to face up to your mixed feelings, to see yourself truthfully through your relationships- to yourself, to others, to your thoughts. 

My yoga today was to do five rounds of Sun Salutations.  I tried to keep ambivalence in mind as I practiced.  I watched myself, and my Inner Nag kept up a pretty steady monologue- "I can't bend forward much.", " I can't hold plank very well.",  "This feels quite uncomfortable."  Sun Salutations feel pretty good unless you're completely distracted by that kind of self talk!  I watched my ambivalence about the lack of "perfection" of my poses, I just tried to relax and watch.  To accept the ambivalence.  I began to open up and see that each time I did a pose it was different from the time before, but that was ok.  I was where I was supposed to be and that was fine.

So today's exercise was well worth it!  Now I have one more thing to add to my list of "Things to Practice".
"Feel the Ambivalence and sit with it anyway."

Saturday, August 24, 2013

Optimism is in the air!





No apologies for not posting!  I actually have been blogging, I've been starting blogs and deleting blogs as I get interested in new things and then lose interest. I was about to start another one today when I realized that I could just post on this one because I've had this blog since 2007 (!) it's been a chronicle of my life! 
I am tentatively committing to 365 days of yoga.  This frightens me a little, how many challenges have I taken up over the years only to give up?  I feel like I've got to a stage in my life where I really have no choice but to do this.  I've been so ill this year with chronic fatigue and injuries.  It's been nearly impossible to be the mother, wife and friend that I want to be.  But Spring is in the air! My diet has changed because it seems I have food intolerances, my chiropractor is an enormous help and I am getting on the mat again, Yay!

When I was young, our local library had a big hardback book of yoga for kids.  I took it out time and time again, the big colourful photos of children being lions, cobras and fish were entrancing.  I loved the lion- spreading my fingers wide, tongue out as far as it would go, eyes wide. I could even do the crow when I was a kid, balancing on my hands, with my knees propped on my elbows, I would slowly tip forwards and there I was teetering on two hands!

I haven't gone to a lot of classes, I did do Bikram's yoga when I lived in the city.  1 1/2 hours of asanas in 38 degree heat.  It was hard but I felt such achievement when the class was finally over.  Bikram's didn't suit my body though, it would take 2 days to recover.  I've been a Mum for 12 years now, so home practice has been the choice for me.  I was still young enough back then to get away with neglecting myself, but these days my body is crying out for some T.L.C- hence the 365 days of yoga.  It may not be hours of practice each day, it might only be tree pose on a busy day, and I want to explore the other aspects of yoga too.

I have a book called A year of Living Your Yoga: Daily Practice to Shape Your Life by Judith Hanson Lassater Phd.  I plan to use this as a framework for my daily practice.  It's not all asanas, there is a lot of food for thought in this book.  I'm looking forward to seeing the changes that will come from this committment!

Ps. That's a pic of Durga. Who wouldn't want to be an eight armed warrior goddess?!